Currently Listening Angel By Sarah McLachlan see related

why is it when everything is starting to sort itself out.... something happens... and your world comes crashing down around you.

     Yesterday around 1, my father and i decided to go and visit my grandmother. She hasnt been doing well and so we have started to visit more often. When we get there, my grandmother was sleeping... and when we left she was sleeping; she was in so much pain that the doctors had to keep her on medication which was causing her to sleep the whole time.    So when my dad and i were about to leave, i decided to write her a note which told her that i came to visit her and that i loved her very much and i would be back in a couple weeks.
      So the night was fun... Kaitlyn and I went shopping and had fun with this guy named Jermey that works at American Eagle.... Then Kait and I got hungry so we decided to get something to eat at California Pizza Kitchen. That went fine.... (even though i felt terrible going there.... but i had no idea she would be working :-/) so i ate my pasta and Kaitlyn and I went to go get gas to kill time to wait for Jermey to get off work (for a certain reason).    
      We are driving around the mall after we got gas waiting for him and i get a phone call... from my mother. Things were rushing through my head like, "i dont have to be home for another hour and a half.... what is she calling for... what did i do wrong.... oh shit did she catch me *******???"   Then thats when i got the worst new of all.....Grandma had passed away just about 30 minutes ago. I didnt know what to do. I had JUST been there today. and the horrible thing was.... i didnt even get to talk to her or say goodbye....
      All i can wish is that she read the letter i wrote her. I really hope she did. and even if she didnt... she is reading it now.. in heaven. Everyone in my family will miss her. she was a Wonderful lady who pretty much just helped everyone else in her life besides herself. It was her time to go... she had been in a lot pain for a while so i think it was good for her to finally go.....But i will miss her... everyday...
     I think what is going to be the hardest thing... is being strong for my father. My dad NEVER cries.. and i had to hear him cry twice yesterday and it about killed me. My father loved my grandmother SO MUCH... probably more than any of her other sons and daughters.... I just hope my dad gets through this.. and i hope i can help him get through this....

so in the last entry i talked about an old best friend... who wasnt there for me anymore... surprisingly... he was last night... I dont think he meant to be there for me.. but he was.  It was probably one of the last times i talk to him for a while... but thats okay, its whatever....we have different lives now and "thats just the way it is"... And to this person.... Thanks.

(the quote is from a song.)

Not only did my grandmother passed away yesterday... but also someone else that i knew through school. he was in one of my classes a couple years ago.. and we used to talk.        Its different though. It Wasnt his time to go. He thought it was. Which is terribly heart breaking. Im praying for his family and his close friends.

Guys, cherish the special people in your life.. and tell them how you truly feel... because you never know when they could be gone... in an instant.

Sorry that this is such a long xanga entry. but i thought all of the information was important.

i love Everyone.

<3 Em

Even though no one goes in xanga anymore, i felt like writing an entry.

I was reading my old entries... and it sent me through the past and having multiple flashbacks... Wow, things have really changed; Especially the people in my life and who care about me...

Why am i upset when i keep telling myself ive lost nothing? .. just a best friend since 9th grade... maybe that is something to lose... And thats the thing, everyone thinks im mourning over them for a reason thats not even the true reason.... Best Friend. Being there. Always. and now gone. FOREVER. thats the reason.

Why is it the one NEW person in your life that you  kinda want, is unreachable. they arent yours. they are someone elses... Do i just like them because i cant have them or do i really like them? complications.

i want things to be perfect in life.

comment if you still read. even though, why would you... no one has these anymore. haha

love always,
Emily Ruth Pruitt

does anyone actually read these anymore? i keep forgetting about it, so thats why i havent updated in FOREVER.

wow. my life has been so eventful i havent even had time to catch my own breath.

Lets see, Yesterday the night ended up with the cops searching through my house for one of my best friends... That should just give you an example of what my life has been like.

But with my boys, it has gotten a lot LESS complicated (thank god). Now i just have to see what destiny and fate give me?

oh yea and i forgot to mention that im a "disappointment" to my father right now... Isnt that JUST WONDERFUL?!... urh..

Comment if you still read it or else this will probably be the last entry.

love you guys,
Emily

Currently Listening Wicker Park By Various Artists see related

wow- i haven't written in over a month.. It's probably because my life has been extremely hectic lately. ::sigh::. trying to write everything on here would be near to impossible.
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If anyone knows at all what all has gone on, you will know how this song is exactly my life and my feelings right now.

Kelly Clarkson- Because of You
I will not make the same mistakes that you did
I will not let myself cause my heart so much misery
I will not break the way you did
You fell so hard
I've learned the hard way, to never let it get that far 

Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side
So I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust
Not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid  

I lose my way
And it's not too long before you point it out
I cannot cry
Because I know that's weakness in your eyes
I'm forced to fake a smile, a laugh
Every day of my life
My heart can't possibly break
When it wasnt even whole to start with

Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side
So I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust
Not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid  

I watched you die
I heard you cry
Every night in your sleep
I was so young
You should have known better than to lean on me
You never thought of anyone else
You just saw your pain
And now I cry
In the middle of the night
For the same damn thing

I HATE LIARS.
I HATE HYPOCRITES.
I HATE SELFISH PEOPLE.
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Love Quote For the Day:::: "Love makes you do crazy things- insane things- you could never see yourself doing, but there you are doing them... can't help it."-Alex from Wicker Park

I love this quote so much. I watched this movie twice this weekend. It is a Wonderful movie and makes you belive in fate. I also watched Serendepity and that movie also has you believe that there is someone out there... just for you. You just have to let Destiny take its course.
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Leave me a comment please!

With my loving heart,
Emily

"When your dreams are lost and blown away and you need someone to
make your day I'll be your inspiration

I'll be your inspiration

If there comes a time your hope is gone and you need some help
to carry on I'll be your inspiration

I'll be your inspiration

'Cause when you look into my eyes You can see there's no
disguise

Don't be afraid To need someone You don't have to be alone"
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its funny how things always turn around. what they are feeling, you arent.. and when you start to.. they arent. see. its "funny"

its also "funny" when you are alone but then wanted at the same time.

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I leave for the Bahamas on the 3rd of August! YAY!

But right now Meghan just had 8 teeth pulled! ! im going to go visit her today and bring her a "Get Well Soon Bag". Pray for her to get better.

My Favorite Thing for the Day:    my Batman band-aids

with my loving heart,
Emily

for once i didnt write on a Tuesday. lol